GAYS DEFEND MARRIAGE

I received this E-mail today:

As a gay man, people often ask me how I can oppose gay marriage. The great irony is that no one should be a more strident supporter of gay marriage than me. My partner is from Eastern Europe and we met online. I invited him to the States in 2002 and we have been together ever since though we have lived under a great fear of deportation. We have taken steps to ensure that he could stay here legally; however the process has been long, expensive, and mentally, physically, and spiritually exhausting.

How much easier life would be if we could simply legalize his status through marriage, as all straight couples can! Yet our faith and principles are more important to us than our desires and self-interests (one of the key things that attracted me to him). Regardless of what’s convenient, we won’t sacrifice our beliefs on the altar of self aggrandizement.

So the question is, am I a gay man or a man? Am I a gay Christian or a Christian? A gay American or an American? How should I define myself – how should you?

Yes, being gay is a fundamental aspect of my nature but it is hardly the whole story. Why should my sexual proclivities dictate the way I view philosophy, theology and politics? Should I vote for McCain only because he is Irish and white like I am? Or should I vote for McCain because I believe he is right on the issues and will better lead this nation? I hope all would say the latter. Yet too many appear to be arguing the former – that all issues regarding societal norms, laws and customs should be construed through the prism of gay-think.

Instead of fighting to redefine the meaning of marriage, which I need not mention are still mostly performed in churches, we should remember what it means to be something other than gay for a few minutes of the day. We should be willing to put other’s interests before our own and do what is best for the whole of society so that future generations may actually be able to live in a better world than the one we are now creating.

If civil unions grant me the basic legal protections that we are all claiming to seek then why not fight for that cause instead of instigating a religious and cultural war? Sadly it appears that too many in the gay movement desire the war and seek to divide the people of this nation whatever the cost. Being the small minority we truly are, have they considered what that future cost may be?

C. M. Lofton, Washington DC